Recently, I had found myself falling more and more in love everyday (with my boyfriend, obviously). If you scroll back through my blog, you will see I once harbored a lot of hate and anger towards my ex and basically every other male in the universe (sorry boys!). Several things have occurred to me over the last few weeks.
I feel that people view the word relationship and the word love interchangeably. They have different meanings depending on who you ask. As I get older, I realize that these words really don’t correlate at all. You can love someone outside of a relationship and just because you’re in a relationship, doesn’t mean it’s love. A relationship, in my eyes, is a bond between two people whether it be strictly platonic, sexual or romantic. Love is a feeling that you express, that you feel, that completely takes over your heart without knowing. I don’t mean love as in you love your parents or your friends, I mean love, in a romantic, passionate, spiritual, intellectual, sexual, emotional….every single aspect of your body and mind is consumed by love.
Love is finding someone that inspires you and motivates you. They are that person that says go to the gym and eat that apple instead of go to the club and take that shot. They want you to be better (even though they probably already think you’re perfect). They want you to be happy and successful. They won’t ask you to leave your job for their benefit but instead will push you to move up the career ladder and better yourself. They never ask you where you’re going or who you’re with, but ask you how you enjoyed it and want to know all the details about your life. They want to share their life with you – not just make you part of their life when it’s good for them (parties, dinners, social events, etc…).They want to your motivation and guess what? They want you to motivate them. I’m not saying make him feel like he’s not adequate for being your significant other, but help him pursue the courage to be better. When he needs someone to help him quit smoking, BE THAT PERSON. When he needs someone to listen to him vent about his job or his personal needs, BE THAT PERSON. When he wants someone to tell him he’s amazing, even when he makes mistakes, BE THAT PERSON.
I’ve learned the hard way about forcing relationships into love. My boyfriend has been such an amazing person in my life and has open my eyes to some many new possibilities. I have learned to love myself in ways that I never knew was possible and I have learned that changing is a lot easier than I ever expected. He has shown me that I can do things I never thought were possible and he has always been that driving force (those are his words, by the way) that push me over the next obstacles.